Miss Flintlock stepped into the central branch wearing her signature look of disapproval. She could never simply return a book through the slot. It was too late for Junior to run or duck behind the desk. He had to deal with her.
“How may I help you?” he said.
“Where is that awful woman?” said Miss Flintlock.
Junior bit his tongue. “It’s just me here, at the moment.”
“Well you tell her I’ve had it. You’ll never see me in this library again.”
“Miss Flintlock,” said Junior, “we’ve had this conversation before.”
“Don’t you start with me, son!”
“We had it earlier this week!”
“Well I don’t appreciate the practical jokes.” Miss Flintlock slapped the book onto the desk. “This time I mean it.”
“Ok,” said Junior. “It was a pleasure knowing you.”
“It was horrific knowing you people! You blew it! All I want is to read something sensible.”
Junior glanced at the book. “But this is a classic!”
“Have you read it?”
“No, but it gets borrowed all the time.”
“Not this copy!” Miss Flintlock snatched the book back. “That wicked librarian wrote this herself, just to scare me!”
“She did not write a whole book for you, Miss Flintlock.”
“Oh, so she just happened to recommend a book in which I am a character?”
“What!”
“There is a chapter about me!”
The librarian walked in with a couple coffees and handed one to Junior. “Hello, Miss Flintlock. Did you like the book?”
“You’ve got a lot of nerve!”
The librarian took a sip. “Hey, I took a risk.”
“You’re lucky I’m not some gullible college kid!” Miss Flintlock left the book and turned in a huff. “I’d have this place investigated! Are any of these books real at all? Ha!”
“We’ll see you tomorrow, Miss Flintlock!”
Junior drank his coffee and watched the old woman exit. “Did you actually write this?”
“What?” said the librarian. “Junior, that book is a century old.”
“No, I mean this copy.”
“Honey, when a book is published, every copy is typically the same.”
“But is this one different?”
“Thanks for watching the desk,” said the librarian. “You really needed that coffee, huh?”
●
Junior took the book upstairs. That Miss Flintlock was really off the deep end. Nevertheless, he wanted to see what she might have been talking about. He flipped through but couldn’t see anything suspicious or pertaining to her.
What a bizarre accusation.
●
Down at the desk, he sat beside the librarian. “You know, Miss Flintlock said there was a chapter about her.”
“She thinks the weather is about her,” said the librarian.
“Yeah, but maybe she’s seriously unwell.”
“You’re a kind soul, Junior.”
“It’s weird, too,” said Junior. “My girlfriend, Jean, she loves that book because there’s a character with her name.”
The librarian laughed. “Honestly, you let Miss Flintlock in your head and you’ll be worse off than her in the end.”
“Yeah." Junior nodded and headed back upstairs. "She really is a lunatic.”
The librarian took the last gulp of her coffee. “I don’t remember a character named Jean.”